This story is part of “I Do” Downtown, a series on all things weddings in Lower Manhattan. Find the series here.
The ring’s been acquired, the question’s been popped, and you and your future spouse have celebrated your impending nuptials with your friends and family at the Lower Manhattan bar or restaurant of your choice. Congratulations! Now, it’s time to plan the wedding, which requires figuring out a date, venue, guest list, dress, floral designer, DJ, wedding planner… OK, well, we’re already overwhelmed.
Don’t worry! There’s a method to the wedding-planning madness. We chatted with two local wedding experts — Gabriella Rello Duffy, senior editorial director at BRIDES magazine, and NYC wedding planner Taylor Post of Taylored Events & Co. — to help get you organized ahead of your big day.
First things first: Make a budget
It’s no secret: New York City weddings are expensive. According to the Knot, the average cost of a wedding here is $75,005, more than twice the national average of around $33,000. The bulk of those costs usually goes towards the venue and catering, but smaller costs, like florals, outfits, stationery and entertainment, can also add up. Both Duffy and Post recommend that you and your partner assess your wedding budget — what you two personally can contribute, and whether or not your families can pitch in — before figuring out what kind of event you want to throw.
“I always suggest discussing what your dream weddings look like and what your non-negotiables are,” Duffy said. “From there, you can think about ideal guest count, the time of year you’d like to tie the knot, and where you want to get married.”
Duffy also suggests making a list of priorities — if you have a large family you must accommodate, for instance, or you’re dying for a live band. “This will help guide your decisions at every step of the way, and help you determine which items are worth splurging on and which you can skip,” she said.
Book a venue
You can’t start sending out save-the-dates or hiring other vendors until you have a date, and in New York City, that date’s going to depend on your venue. Here, venues book up quickly and can have long waiting lists — according to Post, couples are booking NYC venues in peak season, i.e. May through October, a year-and-a-half to two years in advance, though you can potentially get a closer date (and better pricing) in the off-season.
“There definitely are circumstances where I have couples that find a hidden gem in less than a year, but if you really want a specific date, you want to start finding a venue at least a year and a half in advance,” Post said.
Post recommends using wedding resources like Zola and the Knot, where you can tailor your search for venues depending on guest count, budget and vibe. There are a number of different kinds of venues in New York and Lower Manhattan — if you’ve got a big guest list, for instance, a hotel ballroom would provide you with plenty of space, while a restaurant with a private event space might be a good fit if your budget is smaller but you don’t want to skimp on the food. DIY spaces like parks and raw event spaces will also have a much lower rental fees and will come with the benefit of being customizable, although both Post and Duffy warn that the costs can add up if you’re required to bring in basics like tables, chairs, bathrooms or commercial kitchen equipment.
Once you’ve got a list of venues that feel like a good fit, start emailing them ASAP for availability and be sure to tour in person before putting down a deposit somewhere so you can get a sense of the full vibe.
Prioritize your dress, photographer, DJ/band and florals
Once you’ve got your venue set (and your save-the-dates sent out), it’s time to start moving on the essentials. If you want a classic wedding dress, Post recommends finding one at least a year in advance if you can.
“There’s a backlog on some of them because they’re handmade, and essentially made for you once you have your fittings done,” she said. “A year leaves you enough time to have two or three fittings before you actually need to pick it up.”
Post adds that the first three vendors you should book are your photographer, entertainment and floral designer (and your caterer if you’re working with a raw space). And if you haven’t booked a wedding planner yet, now’s the time (Duffy even suggests making the wedding planner your first booking, especially if you want a full-time planner instead of a month-of coordinator). Having someone help manage vendors, bookings and more will make your wedding planning experience far less overwhelming so you can actually enjoy your engagement and wedding day.
Don’t forget the extras
Once the big bookings are made, you can start thinking about extras, like your cake, beauty team, rentals, transportation and nice-to-haves like a photo booth. Be sure to budget for additional wedding events if you’re planning them, like a bridal shower, bachelor/bachelorette party and rehearsal dinner.
Another overlooked extra? Tipping your vendors, which Duffy says should be around two percent of your total budget, plus an extra stash just in case. “I recommend reserving around 10 percent of your budget as an emergency fund, for any unexpected costs that arise as you get closer to the wedding day,” Duffy said.
Use New York as your backdrop
Wedding planning can be stressful and costly, but it’s important to keep in mind that it’s an event celebrating you — and if you’re getting married in New York, it’s also a celebration of your favorite city (and if you’re getting married downtown, your favorite neighborhood, too). Duffy recommends incorporating the city in your wedding as much as possible, especially during your photo shoots.
“Make sure to carve out some time for portraits with your favorite Lower Manhattan landmarks or on the city streets,” she said. “You’re tying the knot here for a reason, so highlight what you love most on your wedding day.”
photo: iStock
